With love, from mom..

“Making the decision to have a child – it is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ” -Elizabeth Stone

I stumbled upon the above quote just around the time I became a mom. I realized how absurd it sounded and at the same time how true it was. It literally does feel like having your heart live outside your body. Anybody who is a mother would vouch for it, I am sure.

It’s such a crazy place to be, you know, inside the mind of a mom. One moment, you are so sure of yourself and your parenting skills and the next moment you wonder if you have made a grave, irreparable mistake by following your instinct. Simple decisions like letting them go out to play by themselves is enough to drive you nuts if your child is a little late in getting back home. By then, your impatient mind had concocted thousand different horrible things that could have gone wrong.

You want to shelter them and protect them and hide them from pain and heart ache and all the evil in the world just by keeping them safe and sound in the shadow of your wing like a mother hen. But then you also want them to grow strong and confident, kind and tolerant, generous and forgiving. Now these are not things that can be taught or learnt in isolation, removed from social interactions, disappointments or failures.

While my overprotective mother’s instinct would love to keep them under wraps unharmed and protected, it’s important for them to step into the world and experience all of this, to become well-rounded and well-adjusted people;  whether we like it or not. Incidentally, we would be doing more harm if we don’t allow this transition.

Therefore I surrender to that universal truth and instead pray that I’ll have the strength to love them well by protecting and covering when needed and letting go when the moment is right.

I know that I am learning on the job…stumbling, making mistakes and learning, all at the same time, so please help me God.

I’ll have to trust in God with all my heart to care for them when I can’t and when I feel things are beyond my control.

There’s no turning back now. Those little hearts of mine are walking around in the bodies of my kids, I love most. But do they understand all this I am going through inside, while trying to look all normal on the outside?

An Ordinary Day

Dear diary, today was a regular day

Everything went as per routine,

Nothing out of the ordinary happened;

Just one of those days when

One thing follows the other

In a monotonous sort of way.

That’s when I thought to myself

What an uneventful and boring day.

Then….I looked around

And saw how many of them were

Having a terrible day today,

Enduring so much  grief and pain

How many had lost a loved one today

How many were struggling to make ends meet

How many wishing that it was

Just another ordinary day.

That’s when I realised

What a blessed day I had had today.

That’s when I realized

How we forget to cherish these

So called ordinary days.

How fortunate we are to have a day

When nothing out of the ordinary happens.

So dear diary, I take back my words,

It was an extraordinary day today...

And I’m blessed to be sharing it with you today.

 

Being different

Since when is being different a bad thing? On the contrary, being different is what makes a person unique and unique is good thing.

 In today’s day and age, trying to stay the way you are, in an ever changing world, is the biggest accomplishment. My kid that way is unique and one of a kind. She doesn’t follow the crowd or get bogged down by peer- pressure to look or dress a certain way. She is, in a way, almost fierce about guarding her comfortable way of life and doesn’t like to complicate things just because others (even her best friends) are doing it.  Any occasion that calls for some dressing–up, invariably becomes a struggle. The endless cajoling that takes on a threatening tone, to wear a simple piece of jewellery or dressy attire, turns ugly. Anyone and everyone we meet are like “Oh! Why is she not dressed-up for the occasion? Why isn’t she wearing any jewellery?  And so on.  Sounds familiar….anyone? Honestly, I did get upset about her fussing about such matters but then started wondering….. What’s wrong if she doesn’t want to? Yes, this might hurt my motherly desires of dressing up my only daughter and admiring her in pretty outfits, but if that’s not what makes her happy and on the contrary, makes her uncomfortable then its about time I put an end to my yearnings.

Similarly, instead of gossiping endlessly on whatsapp or chat sessions, she prefers writing and she calls it her “Creative writing” time. Either that or she paints/draws or reads books. These are her routine after-school activities. And it doesn’t hurt to have an incredibly sharp mind either…that way, she doesn’t have to spend a lot of time slogging over her school work.  She effortlessly aces all her tests, leaving enough and ample time for all her so-called activities. For an onlooker, it might seem like such a waste of a perfect evening, but for her it’s an evening well spent doing what she likes best. Sounds strange for a teenager, doesn’t it? Well…I definitely don’t think so and nor should you, if you have one like mine.

Do we unknowingly push our kids to be a certain way just because it’s the norm and everyone expects it from us? Do we regard other’s opinions over our own children’s likes and dislikes?  Most of the time, the answer is a very big and uncomfortable YES. It all stems from our inherent want to be accepted as perfect parents having perfect kids…(knowing well that there is no such thing called a perfect parent or a perfect kid).

Let’s step aside from the rat race for our own good. Let’s celebrate our children’s uniqueness rather than forever trying to make them fit into an ill-fitting mould. They are wonderful as they are, so let’s let them be.

My first batch of class 10…

“A teacher affects eternity, he can never tell where his influence stops” – Henry Adams.                      I realized today how true this statement was….

Today being the last working day for my class 10 students, lots of things were on the cards.  First was a temple visit to get the blessings of the almighty and then of course a class photograph, to be cherished for years to come and there was also the farewell party for class 12.  I got ready for school expecting only these events and of course a small reminder to myself that I need to tell my students to collect their practical records from the lab as a reference for their board exams. Today being Friday, I had the first period with them and that gave me some surety that I might be able to do as I planned before they got caught up with their events for the day.  After I reached the class and handed over their books, I sat down for a casual chat with them, knowing well that this might probably be the last time I will be meeting some of them, as they may have plans of moving to another school.

What I didn’t expect was the torrent of emotions this was going to unleash. What started out as a casual reminiscence, going down the memory lane (some as long as 6 years back, as I had been teaching some of them since they were in 4th grade) slowly turned into an emotional roller-coaster. Soon there was no stopping those tears from streaming down their cheeks. Everyone shared some incident or the other….saying they loved me because I was fair to all and never partial, some said they liked how I always came well-prepared for every class, while some liked the fact that no matter how silly or out of context their doubts were, I never brushed them aside etc..etc…

The most heart-warming one was shared by my newest student who had been with me for just a year. She started out by telling me how I was the reason she started liking Biology, as up- until then she had hated that subject. (Did I mention that I am a Biology teacher? Well, now you know).  I couldn’t believe it completely though, as kids say the darndest things sometimes in an emotional state. As if sensing it, she insisted that I listen to the whole story and went on to share that due to her earlier hatred for the subject, she had clearly told her family that she would never take up medicine as a profession. It seems her parents were really disappointed as they had high hopes of seeing her become a doctor.

Then, one day, after one of my classes where I was explaining the circulatory system and how the human heart works (yes, she even remembered the exact topic) she had gone home and told her mom that she wanted to do medicine. Her mother was obviously stunned  and of course very happy to hear that and the reason behind her decision.

Just like that.....an important, monumental decision was made. So when I hear such instances, I wonder how many lives we touch in this profession, without even realizing it.

Organic all the way....

The newspaper articles are buzzing with this new favourite word of theirs, organic this organic that….now what’s this hullaballoo all about. Is it just a fashion fad or is it here to stay? Who is to decide…
Organic farming is a form of agriculture that relies on techniques such as green manure, compost, and biological pest control.
Oh hey, hey! Now don’t stop reading this post because you are suddenly pondering over the complexity of it all. This is just a definition given in Wikipedia when you search for organic farming.
An exclusive kitchen garden that provides a sufficient supply of cooking essentials for a family does not require a huge space or a lot of additional burden. All it needs is a little patience and some perseverance.
From ever fluctuating vegetables and fruits prices, from pesticide-ridden vegetables and herb, there is only one solution; your own small kitchen garden. And yes, even you can do it. If you think you can’t, let’s see what’s stopping you from trying your hand at this; space constraint, resources, time constraint…What if I tell you all this can be worked out, you know, the space constraint, resource and guidance…umm....the time constraint part, now that no one can help you but yourself.

 Even in a 20-30 sqft space in your balcony/kitchen or terrace you can have this vegetable garden. For spaces less than this, you can opt for a vertical garden. I mean, space is really not a constraint.

 So, now that we have one constraint down, let look at the second one. We have umpteen number of online sites for guidance and reference. For not so net savvy people, we have a number of urban gardeners on the rise to help you give hands-on training and support with a minimal consulting cost.

 Now for those with time constraint, I am sure squeezing in half an hour (15 minutes in the morning and 15 min in the evening) won’t be such a hassle. Just take a break from your facebook and whatsapp and see how much time you can save in a day and the plus point is, you not only get a zen feeling of calm and peace while gardening, you experience a euphoria when you see something grow…from a tiny seed to a sapling, to a plant bearing flowers and then the flowers turning to fruits…oh what a feeling of accomplishment!!! Now that’s definitely worth sharing with your friends on facebook. I am sure you will agree.

So, imagine growing your own vegies and knowing what’s in them while you relish your dishes without any doubts of chemical contamination…feeding your family without doubting the nutritional content and freeing yourself of the constant worry of feeding poisonous chemical in the name of nourishment to your young kids…Isn’t that worth a little time and space in your busy schedule.
Imagine never having to rush to the nearest store for vegetables (saving on petrol is just a side-effect...err....benefit) or ordering one day ahead on those highly popular door delivery portals which are dime-a-dozen, mushrooming all over the city (aptly targeted at people like us making us lazier by the day)
Imagine a terrace garden or balcony garden in every household…Not only will the chemical menace stop, our needs will be met more economically, instantly and in an eco-friendly manner. How gratifying…